Why bride pay for wedding

The dowry and trousseau were a necessity of those times, because they ensured that a groom would have the things he needed to support his new wife and their children to come. I'm not saying that it's abhorrent to allow your family to pay for your wedding — if they really want to do it, let them. What I am saying though is not all brides should expect their parents to foot the bill for your champagne tastes when you really ought to be working on a beer budget. If your dad works sixty hours a week just to pay their bills and you expect him to buy your wedding dress, maybe you need to shop at David's Bridal instead of Kleinfeld's.

It's one thing to accept offers of financial help from family. It's another thing entirely to guilt them into it or solicit donations, or expect them to go over their own budget to satisfy your desires for the opulent. If you want that crazy chocolate fondue fountain, start saving your pennies! You may be entitled to get married, but no one owes you a TLC fancy-schmancy wedding if you can't afford to do it without exploiting your loved ones.

Yeah, it's nice if your family wants to help, but it's not exactly reasonable to expect them to pay for your life choice read: getting married. If cost is such an issue, get thee to a courthouse and a justice of the peace, friend.

Otherwise, learn to budget what you can actually afford. Sometimes, that might mean selecting an in-season flower instead of the exotic orange blossoms you wanted, or getting married on a Friday night instead of a Saturday afternoon. This kind of sacrifice is really an important lesson, one that will serve you well as you enter into married life.

With every questionable-twist of the lip, my matrimony-related-decision-making process, comes slightly un-done and I'm left asking myself; if the decisions I'm making about our wedding, which will ultimately be the bunting-draped rocket that launches us into married life, are the right ones for us?

I'm talking about the decisions that dictate how much, and what kind of tradition we'll be incorporating into our marriage. This I know, is the female fiasco that plagues every slightly-inclined-to-call-herself-feminist-thinking bride to ever question the merits of "something blue. No matter who contributes, it's a welcome gesture—whether it's set of parents, both sets of parents, grandparents, or anyone else. On the other hand, if the couple funds the entire affair themselves, they retain more control over the wedding budget.

There's no right or wrong way to split wedding costs—each family and situation is unique. As you navigate your own wedding, budget and cost-splitting, here are some things to keep in mind as you figure out who pays for what.

It is best for the bride and groom to have a private discussion first before speaking to parents about helping to cover costs. Post agrees, and advises couples to then delicately broach the subject with family members. The last thing you want is a misunderstanding and you find yourself coming up short, or someone feeling like they need to contribute more than they expected," adds Carlson.

The bouquet should be a gift from the groom to the bride, as she is his date. Who pays for the bridesmaid dresses and usher suits? Although more and more, bridesmaids are paying for their own dress. This is something which you should definitely discuss early on with your bride squad, to avoid any confusion later.

Check out our ultimate list of the best places to get bridesmaid dresses! As for the best man and usher suits? Unless they are matching and require special suits, the ushers should pay for them themselves.

However, this will really depend on what the families are comfortable with. Save Pin More. Credit: Brian Dorsey Studios. Get the traditional rules for who pays for the wedding details. Start Slideshow. Credit: Jose Villa. Credit: Greer Inez Photography. How to Announce You're Engaged. Credit: Trent Bailey Photography. Credit: Lisa Lefkowitz. Credit: Bryce Covey Photography. Credit: Elisabeth Millay.

Credit: Laura Murray Photography.